There’re a lot of types of depression in a modern world, but not everyone knows what postpartum depression is, because this psychological disorder is usually experienced by young parents. If you think that only women are at risk of postpartum depression, then you’re mistaken, because men’s psyche is vulnerable to such significant and stressful event as well. It means that men also need psychological support, personal space, motivation and time to rest.
Men are diagnosed with this type of depression less than women, but their symptoms are more prominent and severe, because they’ve to get things done, provide for their family and lead an active social life in spite of their illness. As a result, this psychological disorder exerts a detrimental effect on the life, success and well-being of the whole family. Read on the article and you’ll understand what reasons make strong and emotionally stable men the victims of postpartum depression.
1. Lack of Willingness to Accept The Crucial Changes
Childbirth is an important and wonderful event that turns the life of two young people upside down. It requires them to turn over a new leaf, look at the world with parents’ eyes, create new values, traditions, habits and lifestyles.
Unfortunately, many modern men don’t emotionally prepare themselves for the continuation of the family name. They don’t have even the remotest idea how a small baby can change their lives. Life is too short, but running to extremes, especially when it goes about childbearing is a bad idea. It’s better to do it when both partners are both mentally and financially ready for crucial changes.
2. Chronic Fatigue
During the first three years after childbirth, the life of a father is a real challenge, because he has to balance family life and work, solve numerous problems, play active role in the process of a child’s upbringing and be responsible for everything twenty four hours a day. Such lifestyle is incredibly harmful for men’s psyche, spirit and organism, because they’ve almost no chance to relax either physically and emotionally. Constant emotional stress usually causes chronic fatigue and even leads to a deep depression.
3. Wives Become More Demanding After Childbirth
It’s absolutely normal for parents to share responsibilities, gender roles and backstop one another when necessary. Men usually fall into postpartum depression and the situation gets out of hand, when their wives start manipulating, setting too many requirements and burdening husbands with extra duties. Men find it difficult to work another shift doing household chores and watching the baby after a hard working day. They don’t like when someone puts a lot of pressure on them. Both spouses are all in the same boat and it’s necessary to treat each other’s case with understanding and indulgence.
4. Lack of Attention From Their Wives
The addition of a child often gives birth to such problems as jealousy and lack of attention within the family. Young mothers usually shift their focus to the babies and it makes their husbands feel neglected. Men understand that their wives are extremely busy and emotionally overwhelmed, but not everyone can accept the situation and overcome the feelings of resentment and jealousy in their hearts. Plus, lack of communication and affection lead them to believe that family life is nothing else but torture. Women should try to give the same level of attention to their men. Otherwise, emotional intimacy and connection with their husbands will be lost.
5. The Mismatch Between Expectations And Reality
Despite the fact that creating expectations is a mistake, many young men wholeheartedly believe that the baby’s arrival will immediately stir their paternal juices and make them the happiest fathers in the world. However, sleepless nights, dirty diapers, baby crying and other realities of life usually dull almost all instincts, squeeze the last drop of life out of them and shatter their expectations. But in a few years the situation gradually improves and fathers start raising, treating and playing with their kids with pleasure.
6. Yearning For Freedom And Carefree Times
Many fathers, especially those ones, who can’t imagine life without entertainment, positive emotions, communication with people and going out with friends, usually fall into deep postpartum depression, because pregnancy and childbirth put an end to a carefree life. These life’s important events motivate fathers to curb their egos, buckle down and take responsibility for their families. No matter whether they like it or not, they need to accept it and realize that they’ve no moral right to give up and get back to those carefree times again.
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7. Changes in a Wife’s Appearance
Pregnancy, childbirth and stress usually have a negative impact on a woman’s appearance. Having a baby doesn’t give women an opportunity to spend enough time every day working on their beauty and appearance. Plus, inactive way of life and lack of physical activity often cause weight gain and make them look unattractive. As a result, their husbands become apathetic and fall into despair, because they’re not mentally prepared for such rapid and unpleasant appearance changes. The situation usually doesn’t move off dead center, because men can’t find correct words to tell their wives about the problem.
Although, it will probably upset women to find it out, but the fact is this. I hope this article will open your eyes and help you understand the true cause of your husband’s depression during the child’s infancy.