Love isn’t as complicated as you think. And women don’t have to be a great mystery. It’s easy to get into the mindset that just because we function differently from each other, that it must be a struggle to understand one another.
The problem most of the time lies in the way we communicate with our partners. We assume that our way of expressing love is their way of receiving it. Or men take an educated guess of what women want and then get frustrated and confused when they don’t get the right response.
Great relationships are something that is built, not found. They take time, patience, effective communication and a desire to keep learning about each other. And making your partner feel valued and desired goes beyond just helping her feel special it actually affects her wellbeing.
We often forget what the benefits of positive behaviours in our relationships can have on our bodies. Women who are more heighten emotionally; need to have their feelings nurtured in order for her to release the right type of chemical balance to keep her feeling upbeat and loved.
It has been said that men feel emotionally fulfilled through physically fulfilment first, whilst for a woman she must be emotionally satisfied before she can be fully physically satisfied.
Showing your appreciation for your partner can be done through so many other ways than physical touch or sex. In fact, women will respond more so to non-sexual actions more so. Whilst sex might help give us that instant burst of endorphins, men need to learn how to create the same chemistry affect without the physical stimulation.
When your woman feels special she will feel more at peace, sleep better, be happy and less stressed and all these things will set the right levels of serotonin through her body resulting in a much healthier and happier partner!
The thing is every woman feels special through her own way. Here are 5 actions in which you can make your partner feel actively loved.
1. Listening to Her
We all know that women speak more than men. It’s a fact that on average a woman can speak thirteen thousand more words than a man. And that’s a lot! So, it makes sense that some men find it hard to listen to everything she has to say. The thing is, having a man take the time to actively listen to us, even if what we say might be trivial, does two things 1) it makes us feel valued and loved, and 2) It gives us a sense of safety to be ourselves in the relationship. When a man makes an effort to listen to his partner, she will automatically feel more understood and secure in the relationship. Not to mention, that listening to your spouse will benefit your relationship as a whole as it a vital part of learning to build strong communication with each other.
Let’s not forget that listening to understand is very different to listening just to respond. Concentrate on the conversation, her tone and emotions. This is honestly the shortest way to understand a woman, because she will literally be telling you everything either through her words, tone or body language.
2. Choosing Her Every Time
It’s funny that we think just because we have entered a committed relationship, that we have made it clear we have chosen that person. Well to some effect, yes you have. However, relationships mean choosing the same person over and over again, despite being married or committed to them. And the way we do this is through making them a priority before everything else. It means deciding to stay committed to them even when the going gets tough, choosing to stay even when the feelings might have left for that day or season. Choosing someone is placing value on them and the relationship openly. A woman wants to know that she is your number 1, before mates, before work, before sport. It’s not that she needs to have your attention all the time, but rather she wants to see in both your words and actions that you are putting her at the top of your list. Choosing her means doing what you did to win her consistently so that she feels appreciated and loved. It means respecting her and making her feels like she is a part of your life in every way.
When woman have a sense of belonging her anxiety levels decreases and her adrenaline works at a more normal and healthier level. Let’s not forget that high level of anxiety can cause weight gain or loss, hair loss and hormonal imbalance.
3. Encouraging Her Dreams
If you want to make a woman feel special, then encourage her dreams. We all struggle with fears and doubts, and when you can have a supportive partner it really makes the journey more enjoyable. Great relationships are about being each other’s team mate. And team mates fight for the same cause, have the same goals and cheer each other on along the way. Having your own purpose outside of your couple will also keep your relationship balanced and will help sustain self-happiness. By reassuring her of your support for her visions and goals, you will make her desires feel more validated and achievable. It also indicates to her that she can open up and share with you, without feeling criticized or laughed at. In essence, you give her the confidence and security to be who she is while still reaching for where or who she wants to be. You will never lose by encouraging self-love in your partner and a part of self-love is pursing what makes you happy.
4. Spending Quality Time Together
Your relationship needs you, and your time. Spending quality time together will give you and your partner a chance to keep reconnecting with each other. Women need to feel that you value the relationship as much as they do, and by spending good quality time with each other you can demonstrate that. It also helps you both recharge and get back on track. Men are usually less vocal about their feelings and emotions and sometimes a woman can feel lonely even when you are around. By putting time aside to just focus on each other, you give her the attention she craves and also builds intimacy outside of being physical.
Life gets busy but your relationship will not survive if you do not give it the adequate attention it needs. We must remember that love is not just a feeling, it is a choice, it is an action. And it is our choices and actions that will keep it thriving and strong, not just our feelings.
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5. Sharing the Load
Women are incredible in the way that we are built to be able to do several things at once. We are mothers, wives, daughters, counselors, cooks, taxi drivers, career advisors, nurses, cleaners and so much more, just on a daily basis. We are strong and capable of bearing many burdens, but it doesn’t mean we want to. To have our man openly offers to share the tasks and take off some of the load is a direct way to make us feel loved and special. It indicates to us that you don’t want us to struggle with the juggle or do everything on own. It also helps give us some energy and sanity back.
A healthy relationship requires equal give and take and when each partner is willing to step in and take some of the other one’s load, it keeps the relationship balanced.