We have all had toxic relationships at some points in our lives. They can come in many forms such as when the boss who is sweet one moment and disapprovingly demanding the next, the relatives or friends who want and demand that you change your ways to match theirs, or the spouse who keeps on pulling you down. It is very easy to identify toxic relationships, but it is not always easy to get rid of them. It is important to do something about such relationships since they can lead to anxiety and depression.
Sometimes the serious toxic relationships call for us to cut off the contact completely while others it is impossible to avoid. If you are in such a relationship that is causing you suffering and stress, find your peace by following these steps.
1. Accept That You Are In A Toxic Relationship
Here your choices are restricted and the best choice is acceptance. You can criticize and judge the other person, but that will only make you feel lonely and tense. Consecutively, you could nurse your despair and anxiety that you will never be in a position to get along with them, making you feel sad and stressed. Deny their existence and pretend that they don’t bother you. You might move on and block their emails and texts, and avoid situations that can turn up.
These are resistance tactics and they can’t protect you. The tactics will allow the person to push in themselves into your psyche. Accepting that you are in a difficult relationship is a reality that will soften us. This will open a door to your wisdom and compassion.
2. Tell The Truth
When you lie so as to avoid upsetting them, you become complicit in the maintenance and creation of the reality, which turns out to be poisonous to you. Instead tell them the truth of your judgement or what you think to be true for other people. It takes a lot of courage to tell your truth, since it makes people angry. You will find that they will be mad at you anyway, without caring what you can do.
Certainly, they won’t like the new truth-telling you making them to avoid you in the future. That is a good thing for you.
3. Don’t Respond Until You Feel Calm.
If you feel afraid and angry, try to bring your attention to your breath and do not write or speak to that person until you cool down. It is common to fight to defend yourself, but do not forget that it is the anxiety and anger that weaken you. Believe that to sooth yourself is the only thing that you can do at the moment. If you feel to excuse yourself, move on and step out. Even though it might be embarrassing or leaves people hanging.
4. Send Healing, Compassion, And Love
During your daily prayer sessions and meditations, you can find time to send thoughts of healing, compassion, and love to this individual. Those people who are happy, love themselves, and always find balance and ease in their lives and avoid causing misery to other people. Instead they spread good energy and love wherever they go. Toxic individuals need our compassion and love the most from us, but they often receive the least of it.
5. Take Full Responsibility For Your Feelings
Nobody should make you feel anything. You should always choose how to react to someone. Regularly, it is not the circumstances that need changing, but is us who requires changing how we respond to a situation. Just the same way your thoughts can create a reality, the way you deem a situation can form the situation that you see.
6. Create And Maintain Healthy Boundaries
When you set boundaries you show the other person that you have respect and self-love. Making and maintaining healthy boundaries are not all about the other people changing, but they are all about conveying to them what you can and can’t tolerate in your life. When you set healthy boundaries you give yourself a gift that keep on giving, particularly if you are dealing with toxic relationships.
7. Look For The Lesson
All relationships in our lives are assignments from the world to teach us more about ourselves. They are mirrors that show us the negative aspects or characteristics we have or what we judge others or in ourselves. Relationships are one of the greatest chances for personal growth. Therefore, look for a lesson and learn from it.
It is not a simple task to know how to handle a toxic relationship. Yet, it is something that requires to be dealt with speedily. Not all people can respond in manipulation or violence. Do not be afraid to discard toxic relationships in your life. Handle them with wisdom, your well-being might depend on it.
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